The leg didn't go completely numb and I was able to get to the apartment and sit down. It lasted about three minutes. Luckily, I immediately recognized it as a mini-stroke, so looked it up on the internet. It said to get to the hospital without delay. I took a cab and was in a bed within half an hour of it happening. (They ushered me right in, past a huge room full of waiting people!)
A nurse took ten phials of blood; another did an ultrasound of the arteries in my neck that lead into my brain, into me. The next day I went back and they slid me through the big CT Scanner.
The doctor said they found a tiny enlargement in my cortex, in an area that indicated it was probably caused by a blood clot from my heart. The CT Scan wasn’t detailed enough to be sure, so tomorrow I will go in for an MRI scan. (Which I would love to watch on the screen. Not too many people’s minds ever get the opportunity to see themselves!) Then, a couple days later, I go for an echocardiogram, which is an ultrasound of my heart, I guess to look for the source of the blood clot, and maybe also to see if a heart attack might be imminent as well. They’ll also attach a monitor to my chest to watch my heart rhythms over 48 hours.
And all because of only three minutes of numbness! Since then, nothing else has happened, thankfully. And the stroke doesn’t seem to have produced any side effects in me. So this is the best possible outcome: a very real occurrence that leaves no damage but nevertheless is loud enough to get me to change my lifestyle.
The doctor, a stroke specialist, gave me a sheaf of notes he had put together on how to prevent further strokes, which included a lot of vegetarian recipes. Essentially, he said, our meat and ice cream diets are the main causes of strokes--and heart attacks. Followed closely by lack of exercise and stress.
Well, I probably eat better than the average Canadian (loving fruit and vegetables and not caring much for meat), and probably even do better-than-average exercise-wise. That leaves stress.
So I’m making some big changes.
In terms of food, I’m aiming towards being a vegetarian, cutting fats and meats, but also, in the interests of health, cholesterol, sugar, and salt. As much as possible, anyway, without becoming a fanatic. I would have already been a vegetarian except that Linda is such a carnivore. But now, because of the big medical scare she had gone through just before I had my stroke (which caused me to worry so much about her that I had the stroke), she has totally changed her eating habits. Now she’s really getting into foods she has always avoided like the plague. So it will be a lot easier for me to change too.
(In case you are a believer in the health benefits of lots of protein and/or fats, the latest large-scale studies show that of the three diets—high protein, high carbohydrates, and high fats—only the high carbohydrate diet increases the life span of the people who live on it. Both of the others reduce the average life span. You can find the studies on the internet.)
In terms of exercise, I’m going to increase it, not decrease it, but not push the aerobics too hard. Keeping it to the pace of a brisk walk will be good for me and shouldn’t kill me.
In terms of stress, I have to make a lot of changes. Whether or not I keep organizing the open mic, I’m not sure of yet. I would like to see it carry on when I quit.
Until I quit, there are a lot of things I can do to reduce my stress load. For starters, I’ve been terrible at organizing myself and my usage of time. Doing it properly is largely a matter of continually writing in a calendar the things that have to be done, when they have to be finished, when started, and when each aspect of them should be worked on to get them done in time. And all this needs to be done two events in advance because the work on them overlaps. I’ve always tried (but never succeeded) to get myself to do this properly. Consequently, I’m always worrying about whether I’m missing things, or if I’m getting them done on time. That worry causes continuous stress, a stress that builds up over time. By the end of the season, I’m burnt out from it.
Another thing I’m going to stop doing is two things at once. Any two things, even simple things like having the TV on while I’m writing something on the computer. Or even having music on while I’m working. Or carrying on a conversation while I’m doing anything. Etc, etc. I’ve noticed that part of my brain suffers tremendous stress from continually trying to sort it all out. (I imagine it doesn’t work this way in extreme extroverts, who need a lot happening just to stay awake.)
I see Linda several times a day sitting out on the balcony meditating. During these times, I have to be careful not to disturb her, which is difficult when she’s there all alone in that beautiful balcony room she’s created, looking out over the green trees of the city, seemingly just waiting to have a good conversation. Instead, I watch and learn the value of meditation. And now, finally, I’m going to join her. After a lifetime of tiny attempts. Hopefully, meditating will stop the stress from building through the day.
Our lives are mostly composed of a steady stream of risks, along with a steady stream of attempts to minimize them. In other words, we live on hope. I’ve reached the point where the next failed risk will likely end my life. So from now on it has to be all or nothing.
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Gavin Stairs Not to second guess your docs, but most likely you have experienced a TIA (temporary ischemic attack) Some people call them mini-strokes. The cool thing is that they are a warning signal with no permanent damage, usually. So heed the warning! And give thanks!
Like · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 19:33 · Edited
Stan Burfield Yes, that was the diagnosis. Thanks, Gavin.
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:18
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Barbara Green I love a non-costly lesson, and you sound like you're embracing everything it has to say to you -- good for you and LInda! I'll be interested to hear how meditation goes for you. I got into it by not trying ... I'd taken myself to the sleep clinic after a lifetime of sleep deprivation and was put on a program of -- guess what -- sleep deprivation in an attempt to address it. I think they assume that if you are chronically short on sleep, you must either sleep late or nap during the day (neither of which is true of me), so they insist on you getting up at an unearthly early hour and never napping. I did this in the winter, so I would haul my groggy self to the couch in front of the front room picture window and flump down on it, staring out blankly. More often than not, that groggy nothingness turned into this surprisingly rich time, and when I read about the experiences of meditators later, I recognized many of them. That helped me get over the idea that Meditation had to be a Big Important Difficult thing. Now I do something called centering prayer, which again is just a matter of setting your intention to be present and open and then releasing thoughts as they present themselves to you in order to keep the mind clear to each present moment. I'll be interested to hear what practice works for you -- I bet you'll find that your walks in the woods are a form of meditation.
Like · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 13:21
Stan Burfield Thanks, Barb! Well, for decades now I've been meditating as a way of going to sleep at night. So I'll simply do that during the day. What that "meditation" has consisted of, before sleep, is me stopping myself from purposely thinking about something, the kind of thinking you do with willpower. Then I just notice thoughts coming and going but without my willful energy pushing them. When that happens for a little while, I'm asleep. But it only works if I'm not under a lot of stress, as I have been so often the last few years organizing the open mic. Because then, instead of sleep overtaking me, something from my world of stress does, and I'm awake willfully thinking about it again. The solution I've found to that is to pick up a book and read. That pulls me out of my world of stress into the completely different one in the book, and soon I'm falling asleep. My sister has had this problem to a much worse degree than I have, and for much longer. She's taking a lot of sleeping pills and even then gets only four hours of sleep a night, if that. Just the other day, I told her about my reading solution, and the world of stress vs the world from the book. She got excited about the possibility, but said that in her case the book would just wake her up and she'd be reading all night (she reads a LOT). But then she thought of music, and that night she tried going to sleep with music playing. She fell asleep right off!! I guess you could say that something like my book or her music puts a stressed mind in a non-stressed state so that it can then meditate itself to sleep. Or something like that. :)
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:44 · Edited
Barbara Green Stan Burfield I listen to audiobooks to go to sleep. Surprisingly, they don't keep me awake usually, and if I'm not sleeping, they're good company and I can rest rather than fret. Way better for you than sleeping pills. Glad your sister has found a solution!
Unlike · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 13:51
Stan Burfield Barbara Green Right. Thanks for the interesting article on anxiety. I'll read it during the day!
Like · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 13:53
Meredith Moeckel Stan....Would you kindly provide me the reference to the anxiety article? I have generalized anxiety that I am always on the lookout for solutions. I also need to learn to meditate! I commend you with all the lifestyle changes that both you & Linda are now implementing, and I wish you both the very best!!!
Like · Reply · 5 August at 18:33
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Halli Villegas yikes please take care
Unlike · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 13:41
Albert Katz sounds like a well-thought out plan for going forward, hopefully for a long time
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:45
Stan Burfield Yeah. Hopefully.
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:46
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Jef-something Brian Thomas Ormston Might I suggest exploring the world's of Tai Chi or Wing Chun... the simple act of incorporating 'sil lim tau' into my daily life has made a positive difference in many aspects of my health (and life in general).
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:47
Stan Burfield Good idea. I've thought about tai chi quite a lot over the years but have never done anything about it. (I think about everything quite a lot but never do anything about much of anything. Which is another thing that has to change.)
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:49
Jef-something Brian Thomas Ormston Meow my friend. All my best energies sent your way. :)
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:54
Stan Burfield Thanks, Jef. And you-being-you have just reminded me of music. I still have my little wooden recorder from my junior high school music class. I'm going to pick that up again.
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:56
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Sharon Wise You and Linda might enjoy the type of dance I teach. I will be adding an introductory class in September. Will send you the info. All the best. :-)
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:56
Stan Burfield Sounds good.
Like · Reply · 5 August at 13:57
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Tom Cull Sorry to hear you had to go through this Stan, but it sounds like you facing this head on, and that you will emerge stronger, happier and, perhaps most importantly, less stressed!
Unlike · Reply · 2 · 5 August at 14:02
Larry Burfield Some very good thoughts Stan. Taking time to appreciate what we have I find is so relaxing and reduces some stress. You are on the right track for sure.
Like · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 14:04
Stan Burfield "Taking time to appreciate what we have." There's a REALLY big point! Thanks, Larry. Enjoy what I have. First, I have Linda. And, other than her, no matter how little I have, I have a LOT. It's just a matter of taking it seriously for what it is and enjoying it.
Like · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 14:11
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Tina Pickard Oh my..I am glad you got the care you needed but I honestly think that exercise is great but climbing stairs in this heat, is too much. Walking is the best.If you can have access to a pool the better. Take care Stan.......
Like · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 14:57
Stan Burfield Thanks, Tina.
Like · Reply · 5 August at 14:59
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Frances Sullivan Wishing you both all the best. xx
Unlike · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 19:19
Linda Eva Williams Very good Stan, and this is a well-written and informative piece. And smart to take a cab asap - my friend, who had a TIA paid $400 for a two minute ambulance ride. I expect you'll be on blood-thinners now as well. What a year! I'm so glad you're well - and veganism is something my vet swears got her husband out of A-fib. I have some excellent middle eastern/Mediterranean recipes if you are interested. Love to Linda...
Unlike · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 19:49
Stan Burfield Yeah, what a year! Right, I'm taking Aspirins. I was on one baby-sized one a day for the last few years because of high blood pressure, but then when I lost 30 pounds and my blood pressure was back to normal I stopped taking it just a few days before the stroke. (Coincidence? I don't know.) But now I'm taking two a day. Thanks for offering the recipes. We seem to have a lot of them that we've seldom used, so now''s the chance.
Like · Reply · 1 · 5 August at 21:16
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Brandi Michielsen Best to you & Linda, in all avenues you take, in recuperating from all the adversities you both have dealt with, in regards to your physical well being. The stress you carried before receiving the positive news in regards to Linda's health, contributing to the mini stroke, think joining her in the balcony meditation time sounds like part to the solution. Coax her into an invite. Offer to make tea, before or after the quiet time.
Like · Reply · 5 August at 21:09
Stan Burfield Great idea, Brandi!
Like · Reply · 5 August at 21:17
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Alan Flowers Thank you Stan for your clear, honest assessment and all the lessons and knowledge you're passing onto us. Best wishes for tons of success for you and Linda
Like · Reply · 5 August at 22:20
Stan Burfield Thank YOU, Alan.
Like · Reply · 5 August at 22:37
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Gord McCaw Wow! Talk about your life altering events. Fortunately you were on top of your situation and were completely proactive in your handling of this. Safe to say that many people wouldn't have been.
As you know, I came within a whisker of dying four years ago with my cardiac arrest (100% closure of my left coronary artery). My good fortune was not being at the wheel when it happened (Elaine was) and a couple of young guys helping Elaine get me out of the car--who just happened to know CPR.
I was clinically dead for at least five minutes but, as they say, the rest is history, instead of me being history. One lingering effect is I don't worry too much about anything anymore. What would be the point? If something needs to be fixed, fix it. If not, then leave it be. Worrying won't fix anything...
Like · Reply · 1 · 6 August at 01:09
Stan Burfield Wow! What an experience! Yes, lucky you weren't driving. I'm with you in stopping worrying. That seems to be a bad habit from our early years. We're finally growing up!
Like · Reply · 6 August at 13:09
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Stephanie Gunter good luck and good health!
Like · Reply · 6 August at 10:37
Bernice Lever Yes, having faith & -- having hope for a better future does help our lives continue. My pal here, Dora , turned 96 years & smiles a lot. She says, '"Life is funny; some things are annoying or hurtful, but in the end they seem to have turned out good for you/ for the best!"
Like · Reply · 6 August at 12:59
Stan Burfield I've been noticing that too. When you finally get past the hurt. At a minimum, the hurts make us more empathetic of other people's hurts.And very aware, finally, that life for anyone isn't the silky smooth thing we often imagine as young people and blame ourselves for not living.
Like · Reply · 6 August at 13:18
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Norma Linder Just a line to wish you all the best, Stan. It sounds as though you're making some very wise choices.
Unlike · Reply · 1 · 6 August at 18:38
Cambridge N Calvin Keenan You and Linda have been through so much ! I'm sending good vibes to you both n prayers . It's been a long road eh :) Time to de stress and take care of you now Sir Stan ! And you and Linda can walk hand in hand and pace yourselves . I have had two MRI for my brain they encase your head lol so no watching your brain while your in the machine . I did get a print out that showed lesions on my brain from the Lyme disease though . It's kinda cool to see your own cranium 💚 the heart echo was awesome I got to watch most all of it , watching your own heart pump it's like so wonderous and hearing it beat and even murmer .... Something inside kinda goes boom shakalaka 🌺 I think you and Linda will love Tai Chi for its so gentle and a moving meditation I just adored it . I had to quit cause my Lyme disease feet n ankles would not fall in line and caused me more pain . But I hope to return when I find a less aggressive teacher 💚Happy Meditating . I also need to play a podcast to fall asleep to and distract my anxious mind , works like a charm two minutes and I'm asleep soundly , comforted by the gentle words soothing my journey 💚 Happy meditating to you and Dear Linda . no more strokes for you !! I like ice cream too ... Lol I just got diagnosed with diabetes so it's gonna be a learning curve for me too man :) love you both so much , Cammy n Cal 🌺
Like · Reply · 6 August at 19:23
Stan Burfield Boy, you're having a tough time, Cambridge. But I love your attitude. You are one RESILIENT lady!!! You're someone to learn from, that's for sure. As for me, I feel like I'm cheating. Physically I feel like a twenty-year-old. Actually better, because I feel much better emotionally than I did then. And yet I've got terrible osteoarthritis, but which is brought totally under control by glucosamine--no symptoms at all except when I stop taking it--, and obviously clogged arteries, but which give me lots of energy, so long as I take care of myself from now on, which I now know exactly how to do. And no pain at all. Yet I'm surrounded by women who are living in pain! Linda, my wife, my sister, you, most of my female friends. So are women more subject to these painful disorders than men? It sure seems like it.
Like · Reply · 1 · 6 August at 19:43
Cambridge N Calvin Keenan Sometimes I think men just handle things in a better manner than us women . My husband seems unaffected by the estrangement of two of our kids , and me I'm still crying every day though it's been eight years , I have five grandkids I see regularly and they love coming here and sleeping over , yet our youngest son and his wife refuses us to even know his two babies , our youngest grandchildren . It just is devestating . I appreciate when three of my grandkids come happily and willingly yet my heart just aches for the two that are missing . My brother is really sick he had surgery on his neck years ago but it seems it was a short term solution as now he suffers daily in torment . I am not sure what the answer is to the mystery you have placed before me . lol Please ask Linda and your dear sister and give me word on their thoughts . ... Also inviting others to chime in on the topic do men handle pain better than women ??? Love to hear everyone's thoughts . Thank you Dear Stan 👍🏻
Like · Reply · 6 August at 20:18
Cambridge N Calvin Keenan I saw the coolest ever arthritis to shirt o will try to find it to post for you , it's a good smile n chuckle 😎