Now I understand what's really wrong with it. Usually, the feeling that wants to be expressed is irritation, or frustration, or self-righteous anger. Well, it may not seem like it at the time, but expressing that anger is an attempt to hurt the other person. I've practically had to study it to see that, but it's true. When you're young you justify it by thinking the other person is hurting you in some way, even if just by irritating you. So they deserve your anger. And anyway, if you don't let them know your feelings good and hard they will probably keep on irritating you endlessly. As well, especially if you're young, mouthing off makes you feel strong, like an adult.
Here's the thing: people who are irritating or frustrating are not trying to hurt other people in the process. That's just who they are. They operate that way. They can't help themselves. But those who express their anger at them because of it are deliberately trying to hurt them, which is to say, to cause them harm.
There is a world of difference between the two.
And something else: those who express anger usually feel pretty good about it. As they are insulting the other person, they are looking down from a higher position, feeling and showing their superiority. But the person who is being hurt is hurt very deeply, far deeper than the other has intended. And that hurt can last for decades. The winner, on the other hand, gets to forget about it within minutes and move on to the important things in life.
Like: 5Grant Dempsey, Josh Livingstone and 3 others
Linda Eva Williams There must be some reason anger exists or it wouldn't be in everyone's DNA. Your view of anger seems to be focussed on those who are basically bullies perhaps. But if we don't express anger at injustices, or the Hitlers and Trumps (talk about an angry guy!) of this world, we are silent cowards and enablers.
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Stan Burfield Good point.
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Stan Burfield I guess you could say that pretty much all of humanity's worst characteristics were important creations of evolution, and no doubt if they didn't exist, neither would we--including all the causes of wars, hatred, patriotism, even jealousy, apparently, to name only a few. What's interesting to me about people is that for the first time in all those millions of years one of evolution's creatures can see what's going on and fret about it and try to control it. Not that it matters to evolution.